I have had no magical humour come to me overnight. As such, I shall simply tell you some of my tastes in music right now. Then look out, because it soon turns into a Facebook-hating rant. Sorry.
My favourite artists are currently, in no particular order, Owl City, P!nk, Avril Lavigne and Maroon 5. Yes, I do also like One Direction and Taylor Swift and I’m sorry if that makes you hate me. Don’t worry, I am in no way a screaming fan girl, and I never post song lyrics to sappy love songs on Facebook – in fact I hardly ever update my Facebook status, or like or comment on anything. Mostly I just message people through it – my friends who live in other countries and stuff like that. Otherwise Facebook tends to annoy me – I hate the statuses that demand something of me: “LMS and I’ll put a heart on your wall!” Who cares? Why should I care about a heart on my wall? You obviously don’t really care who it is. “Like for a tbh!” Yeah, as if you’re gonna be honest. I would have no friends if I was honest on Facebook. “Like for a like and a rate!!!!” I never like these. I know I’ll just get some variation of ‘you’re so weird but you’re smart, 7’ because there seems to be a rule that you only give people you hate a 6 and everyone else is wonderful. Then, there’s the statuses that are passive-agressive, or being inspiring. Unfortunately, me being myself, I have to resist the urge to post sarcastic comments on these. For instance: “Always be yourself, if anyone tells you it’s wrong to be yourself, they’re the ones who are wrong, you don’t have to change for anybody.” I always think, ‘but what if I’m a serial killer who will murder someone just for pronouncing my name wrong? Then shouldn’t I listen to the doctors telling me to change?’ Or, for passive-agressive. “Do you ever listen to anyone else’s voice but your own? Yeah, I didn’t think so.” So, what exactly is the point of you saying this?
I guess this post can show you straight off that I’m not exactly a beautiful example of a human being. Fortunately, I almost always keep these less-than-gracious thoughts to myself. Oh shoot. Realising that I’m a bitter cynic who technically should have no friends is rather annoying, don’t you think? Possibly I should leave now before you nonexistent people hate me anymore.